Make a bot on reddit called Schizophrenia Bot that replies to you but no one else can see, so when you reply back it looks like you're talking to yourself
They need to make a bar made of lots and lots of Legos that explodes into a million pieces when an overheight truck hits it, thus warning the truck driver that the upcoming bridge is too small and that he should stop.
I was at the scene of a fatal overdose and the police took all of my belongings. I am now being evicted from my apartment as one of the things was my wallet containing rent money and have lost my job. [NYS]