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Not trying to be rude, I’m genuinely curious: what is the average lifespan for a person with Down syndrome? I rarely see someone with Down syndrome this old
Uncle died at like 55 I think it was. He aged really hard with it though. He was engaged to a girl with downsyndrome when they were in there 20s and she had passed by 25. Honestly think its just hit and miss.
My uncle had Downs as well. If I remember correctly he died about the same age. It hit him hard too. He eventually had to be put into a special needs nursing home, he formed dementia and my grandmother couldn’t take care of him anymore because she was 91 or 92 at the time. After he passed she passed not too soon after at 93.
I know next to nothing about downs.
Is there a physical reason their lifespan is shorter? I had just thought it was a brain thing.
Down Syndrome is from having an extra copy of Chromosome 21. Enough to completely fuck up all the protein levels, but a small enough Chromosome to be survivable having an extra copy. It results in potentially a whole bunch of health problems (excluding the obvious mental development problems) . The most common include:
High rates of leukaemia
Poor immune systems
An almost 100% rate of early onset Alzheimer's
I have a cousin with downs, he wasn’t expected to reach 30. He’s still kicking, but they end up having lots of health problems, like heart conditions.
In his case, he also started going downhill once he finished high school. He was so used to a routine, and then it all came to a sudden stop. He became depressed and it was hard for anyone to get him to want to do anything. He also started hallucinating and talking to things/people that aren’t there and some of them were scary/mean he would say. I don’t know if that’s common, but I know it’s not something he had a problem with until his mid-late 20s.
Edit: gotta love typing on your phone.
My brother has down syndrome and he started talking to people who weren’t there as well a little while after graduating High School. I think it might be that he got so used to seeing the same 20-30 kids every day from elementary through highschool and he just couldn’t handle the adjustment.
I had a kid with Down’s syndrome in my grade from middle school through high school. From my understanding downs kids are allowed to stay in the public education system until they are 21. There’s not much free support after that though and that can lead to depression.
Dykens et al conducted a study in 2015 that ended on a need for more further study, but showed an increase in psychosis to some degree in patients with down syndrome versus the general population.
Of those studied 35% exhibited signs of things ranging from psychosis NOS, to depression with psychotic features.
It goes on to state that there’s no evidence to substantiate an elevated risk of schizophrenia in patients with down syndrome per se, but that there are considerable difficulties in diagnosing an episode of schizophrenia because most of the diagnostic criteria isn’t applicable. But with schizophrenia typically showing in early 20’s it’s possible he could have testing done that could be beneficial to either himself or study all together.
To my understanding amongst many other health problems, people with Down syndrome develop Alzheimer's disease at an earlier age due to having an extra 21 chromosome. On the 21 chromosome a gene codes for amyloid protein which can eventually cause build-ups of amyloid plaques in the brain leading to Alzheimer's. As Down syndrome have that extra chromosome they produce more amyloid protein in general, increasing the likelihood for amyloid plaques to form and a higher chance for Alzheimer's.
From what I remember Down Syndrome sufferers who survive long enough have a 100% rate of early onset Alzheimer's.
Holy shit. 100%. Not even a little chance.
I'm not scared of alot of things, but losing my mind, my memories and forgetting the ones I love terrifies me.
Fuck Alzheimer's disease.
You forget how to do things first. Going through early onset with my mom now. She still remembers most people and can still form memories, but she can't cook, can't tell time, has issues using a phone/tv, has trouble speaking (can't get the words out) etc etc. It's honestly not what I thought it would be, but I know the day is coming she'll forget me.
Reading this made me so sad. I know it might not mean anything for some but tonight I will think of you and your mom in my prayers. send you and your family a virtual hug
My father had Alzheimers and never forgot me he had issues with many things but always seemed to remember me and my siblings... there is always hope don’t give up!
Losing autonomy must be awful as well. Real scary stuff. Sorry you have to go through this. I wish you strength.
There's a heart condition that often forms alongside the mental health problems. It's not always there but is common, I think even without that other heart issues usually develop. I'm not any kind of expert and am half remembering an article I read earlier so take this with a grain of salt.
To be kind of a pedantic prick it's not really a "mental health" issue as we colloquially think of other mental health issues like depression/schizophrenia/BPD/etc. Down syndrome is a genetic disorder that results in intellectual disabilities and a large host of physical disabilities including poor immune fuction, delayed development, and an increased risk of congenital heart defect, epilepsy, leukemia, thyroid diseases, and other mental disorders.
I don’t think it’s prickish at all. It’s important to make the distinction.
My great uncle has it and is 65 I believe
Down's Syndrome comes with a huge predisposition for hearth disease. Those who survive their 20's will have a good chance for an almost normal life span of 60 or more years today i belive. The mortality among children and young adults is very high.
For white people it’s about 50-60.
For whatever reason other ethnicities it’s about 20.
I know this because I asked reddit why I’ve never see an asian Down syndrome person.
Many Chinese Nationalists use Down syndrome as an example of why they believe eastern medicine, diet, and Chinese people as a whole are superior to whites as well. Their evidence is that you see more white DS people than any other race.
Since I’m being accused of lying. I’m just spouting what another redditor once told me!
For whatever reason other ethnicities it’s about 20.
Wait, seriously? Why is it so much lower for other ethnicities?
Here is a well written article with sources about it: https://pediatricsnationwide.org/2016/05/19/uncovering-racial-disparities-in-down-syndrome/
We concluded that although racial disparity in mortality exists, the underlying cause remains unidentified
We found racial disparity in maternal drug use, hyperbilirubinemia and intubation but couldn’t easily relate this to mortality. Among children with DS less than 5 years of age, we saw significant increases in referrals to Cardiology for black children compared to white children. We also saw trends of increased incidence of CHD for black children. However, correlations with death records did not demonstrate differences in rates of cardiac-related deaths. We did not detect racial disparity in cardiac surgery.
Although we did not detect significant racial differences to explain mortality differences, the multitude of racial equality in our results is worth noting. We investigated dozens of factors to attempt to detect subtle differences but saw that overall, individuals with DS who are white and black do not differ in these areas.
We did not demonstrate a medical basis for racial disparity in life expectancy. This may be due to our small sample size as, fortunately, the majority of patients in our database were still living. The number of individuals of races other than white and black were also few, preventing us from drawing conclusions about other races or ethnicities.
We concluded that although racial disparity in mortality exists, the underlying cause remains unidentified despite use of a comprehensive, longitudinal database of individuals with DS and review of death records. Because access in care for other diseases is known to differ by race, we wondered if referrals to Cardiology may be an indicator of racial differences in access to care.
TL;DR: they don’t really know
This sounds awful but I wonder who will die first if one of them hasn't already. How sad for either one to lose the other. They are obviously extremely close.
I had the same thought, but also they've got good fortune to live longer than other people with their conditions (Downs or just being elderly) and have had a lot of time together. I hope the dad has a game plan/support system for his son for when he passes/gets incapacitated and alternately for himself if his son passes away. Probably he does, but that'll still be very sad either way.
This is what I was thinking. His poor kid when he passes, I hope he doesn't think he will come back after a week.
This video makes me sad and happy at the same time.
Precisely my thoughts.
From the video and the fact that people went on the trip with them, it seems they have other family members who are loving and supportive, and will be there for the one left :)
This makes me sound like a peice of shit but i hope the son dies first the dad could prolly handle it better
No I understand, many parents of special needs kids hope for that. (I only know this because of my aunt and her special needs daughter, I'm no real expert)
It's honestly one of the things I dread most about my future. I have a brother who has a severe form of autism and having my parents die would be devastating. I would either have to seek out a place for him to live, move him down to where I live and take him away from his already established support network, or move back up to where he lives and basically upend my entire life.
Also, China if your child has downs syndrome you can have an abortion at any stage of the pregnancy.
This is also true of England.
Indian here. I've seen many down's kids in special schools. I was quite surprised when I first came to the US to see the down's people in the US look very similar to the ones in India. Learned about the common facial features after that.
.... I’ve never seen any other race with a mental disability, I’m just now realizing.
I work in a SEN school, and theres a lot of non white students. But until i started there i thought the same as you.
I live in a mostly white upper middle class town that's in a mostly non-white lower class county and we started a nice sports program for kids with various developmental disorders. There are a ton of non-white kids and their families from the county. It leads me to believe that the lack of visibility is mostly a lack of resources. The family's are so happy to have us nearby and it's great to see. If both parents have to work and your town/neighborhood doesn't have the resources, I think the family has no choice but to keep them at home where they can be supervised and cared for by a relative. So you never see them. Race and poverty run along the same lines so it looks like a race thing I think.
Sounds like we run similar programs :)
And agreed it's largely determined by which kids have access to the resources for help. The behavioral therapist that works with our program sometimes gets assigned to kids that their parents have essentially hid from the world for years (one Asian child was literally kept in his bedroom his entire life until age 7-8 when they found out they could get government aid) so I agree I think a large part is the stigma in other ethnicities but also access to resources.
Someone needs to really go after the school system. That's were it starts schools are supposed to provide reasonable accommodation's. That also includes transport, job training and advocacy for regular services. Special Needs students generally attend school till 21. In that time vocational training should have occurred. At 21 they then can apply for Disability and receive medical benefits and some housing money albeit quite small. Every state is a little different. The liberal states tend to offer more advocacy as they are big on social services. The young man pictured could in most circumstances find work if he was trained. Simple jobs but work. I am married to a Special Needs Teacher and team leader for her group. About 7/10 in her groups get at least a part time job. One with downs work for social security administration and does Xerox copying all day. We live in an upper middle class white neighborhood of Chicago.
Someone needs to really go after the school system. That's were it starts schools are supposed to provide reasonable accommodation's. That also includes transport, job training and advocacy for regular services.
I agree with you. But you know, as well as I do, that this will cost lots of money. And, how do you get more money for these programs? School taxes. Now you got even more prone unhappy with the level of taxes....
Former student of a SEN but full integration school in Asia chiminging in! Yes, there are Asians too. My batch had 20 students. 2 teachers at all times. For certain classes some students will move to another class or have another teacher nearby.
I have, and the ones I remember tend to be either Arab or from the Indian subcontinent.
People's awareness must be down to demographics of their local area. I've generally lived in places where the largest ethnic groups are white, and then Indian or Arab, hence why they're the ones I think I've seen the most
There's a black guy on my route to work that I wave at a lot. He has a mental disability and seems to just enjoy being outside and watching cars pass by.
Just go to a special olympics event, there are all types.
I actually just saw my first little black girl with down syndrome last week. I was surprised. She had a big supportive family and was absolutely adorable helping then get supplies at the hardware store.
I live in Hawai’i, and the majority of our population is Asian. So I more often see Asian kids with disabilities than any other demographic.
They're usually hidden from society or aborted, sadly.
I don’t think choosing to abort is sad. My mother was a nurse in the “system” and did home health for developmentally disabled folks and while some were happy stories, to many more were stories about how a disabled child was neglected, imploded mariages due to stress, elderly parents panicking about what was going to happen to their child when they died or got to old to remain caregivers and they needed to go into a group home, developmentally average siblings being denied support and opportunity because of a disabled brother or sister. Not to mention the horror show that is the state facilities.
If you have the means to care for a child like that all your life and keep them healthy and happy. Great. Lots of people don’t and spend their whole lives scraping by.
Personally, if I found out during pregnancy the child had a severe developmental disorder I’d abort. No one would love that child more than me, and I would not be able to bear the thought that if I was gone, that child would more than likely need to go to some outpatient facility and be ignored and abused because the “system” gets no support in this country.
People gotta do what’s right for them.
I used to see this woman with down syndrome on the bus I took every day. I also noticed her elderly parents who looked completely exhausted. The woman kept coming up to people saying "I'm 40 today".
I've noticed that as an Irish person, we seem to have the largest representation of Down Syndrome people at the special Olympics. We also had a law overturned, so now abortion is legal (or close to it) in Ireland. Before this happened, both sides of the debate were told to leave representatives of the disabled community or that topic out of it incase it caused bias/ made people worried about eugenics.
That's the thing though Iceland have almost eradicated Down Syndrome with a 100% termination rate of pregnancies with a chromosome abnormality. It's heavy handed genetic counseling.
It's a tough thing to talk about, in my opinion I believe it should be okay to terminate in this case. Many of them bring great happiness to their family/enrich their life/are high functioning but many have very little function e.g. when I volunteered at a home with many adults who had down syndrome, it was heart breaking as many had the mentality of children/ wanted all of the attention from nurses/felt neglected if someone else was being taken care of. It was so odd to see adults acting in such a way with no independence.
It's a complex issue but I'm saying if it showed up that there were chromosome abnormailities in the screening, I would absolutely terminate the pregnancy.
It's a sad thing to say that you'd terminate, but I would also. I just can't do it. When I was pregnant with my son they did genetic testing on me and found out that I was a CF carrier. His father refused to pay to get tested to see if he was also a carrier. It was a terrible thing to worry about because I had to get my daughter tested for CF and then worry about my unborn son. I didn't want to imagine his life with CF. Thankfully both are fine, but both had a little bit of developmental delays and my daughter still struggles a little bit and my son is talking and seems just fine.
This is a big part of my reasons to support a right to choose. All the "pro-life" people seem to care about is giving birth to every pregnancy.
Quality of life MUST be the focus. Just being alive and suffering for years on end for whatever reason should not be held up as morally superior.
While it is sad to hide them from society, I would hesitate to call aborting them "sad". Downs has a very WIDE range of presentations and not aborting is a very huge gamble. Some people with Downs are extremely low functioning and will never go on to be a part of society in any way. Others are very high functioning and go on to lead semi-normal lives. Wanting to save someone from a life of disability and difference isn't sad. It's a kindness that should be more socially accepted than it is. Nobody should be shamed for wanting to prevent that for their child.
Fixed: some less-than-tactful wording.
While it is sad to hide them from society, I would hesitate to call aborting them "sad".
As a sibling to someone with low functioning Downs syndrome... I would actually agree. And I love my sister to bits. But I've also seen the toll, the anguish and heart-break on my parents essentially giving up their lives to take care of my sister. It's no easy road to go down, and seeing first hand how much it takes... no, it's not that simple that choosing abortion is "sad".
Don't forget that regardless of functionality, people with downs syndrome can also have serious health problems including, but not limited to: heart, gastrointestinal, and kidney issues.
They also have under developed immune systems which put them at higher risk for infections. They are also at much higher risk of developing certain types of leukemias.
I absolutely agree with you. When I was a kid a friend of mine had a sibling with extremely low functioning downs and it was probably the saddest thing I’ve ever encountered. He was a shadow of a person. He died very young but when I was a kid he was significantly older than me, but still had to sit in a car seat, be hand fed. Could barely talk, I’m talking just a handful of words. I’ll never forget him. It was just the saddest thing ever, the kind of thing you can’t forget once you encounter it. Props to his family for dealing with it in the best possible way but I can’t help but think he may have been better off never having lived. Terrible to say/think but gosh I can’t imagine a life like that.
As horrible as it is, I wish that more people had these sort of experiences. Unless you have had them, it's almost impossible to understand where people like you and I are coming from. I am a teacher and work with children that have disabilities ranging from mild to extremely severe. They are so, so dear to my heart and never in a million years would I dream of erasing them from the planet. They're alive and they are beautiful.
But at the same time, I truly believe they would not have chosen it for themselves if they had the mental capacity to understand what "typical" is, the ability to run and play with other kids, the ability to communicate in the most basic of ways. While they might not be suffering and may not have any idea that they are different, they sure are not living. In this day and age a "life" like that can be prevented. I wouldn't wish that life or having to make that choice on my worst enemy.
Some people with Downs are extremely low functioning and will never go on to be a benefit to society in any way. Others are very high functioning and go on to lead semi-normal lives.
I feel very conflicted about your comment. On one hand, I would probably seriously consider an abortion if doctors told me my future child would have Downs.
On the other hand, I think it's also important that we don't tie the value of someone's life to how much they contribute to society. A person working retail should not be viewed as "lesser" than someone working in STEM, for example.
Personally I think it should really depend upon your means: can you feasibly care for the child no matter where they fall upon the spectrum (mild to severe disability?) Adoption is difficult enough already for healthy, non disabled children. The odds of someone adopting your severely disabled child are drastically low, so no real options there either. Pushing them off into the state creates a whole other problem entirely, but you get my drift.
With my second child for some reason my quad screen came back as a 1/72 chance that he would have Down’s syndrome, and that there could also have been some other chromosomal deficiency. I was 26. My odds should have been something like 1/5000 for Downs alone. Fortunately, he is a healthy, genetically ‘normal’ little boy. But after having genetic counseling and being made aware of the risks and what exactly the outcome could have been.. I considered aborting. It’s not about having a ‘perfect’ baby. It’s about knowing that they will be able to keep themselves safe, warm and fed when I eventually die.
Down syndrome also comes with some huge health issues, including cancer. That is horrible for any parent to watch, and not knowing who will look after your child after you die if you don’t watch them die before you.
Basically, I would never ever judge someone for choosing to end a pregnancy because the fetus has down syndrome. It’s a hard choice for any couple.
It's also about quality of life. It begs the question if it's cruel to bring someone into this world who will never be able to enjoy it because of severe disability. If I was told my child would be downs I would abort. I have a low functioning autistic brother and while he brings a lot of joy to the family I've also see the hardship in raising him. He also became a pawn in my parents divorce where my mother emotionally manipulated him and abused him and since he was non verbal and couldn't comprehend what was happening it was painful to watch. This world is tough enough that I wouldn't want to make it any harder on my child.
I agree that their quality of life should be considered. But, I don’t think a persons “benefit to society” should determine whether or not they should live.
I have a cousin with down syndrome who has a very low quality of life and I would never make any other choice with a potential child showing clear signs of down syndrome other than to abort the pregnancy.
It's not about their "benefit to society", it's about their quality of life in and of themselves, and the extreme difficulty and resources that would be needed, lifelong, to bring them up to even a low quality of life. Not every family has those resources, and more to the point not every family can afford to allocate those resources away from their other children. That's a hard choice, noble to make, but not monstrous to make the other choice by any means.
Having witnessed the low end of the potential outcomes, where my cousin is in many ways a 43-year old two year old, who has such anxiety issues that he cries himself to sleep every night and has ground his teeth to stubs with constant teeth grinding, I could not in any good conscience risk forcing that existence upon another human being. To willingly consign someone to that fate would be, to me, far less ethical than preventing them from existing.
Woof yeah, that's a can philosophical worms that usually doesn't lead anywhere good in practice.
I just sit on my ass and play video games. I would be executed by my benefit to society.
I know a 30-something Japanese guy with Downs. I don't know whether life expectancy would have anything to do with how it presents - I've heard it can vary? He is pretty high functioning and is an excellent pianist/musician.
Knew of an Asian kid with DS at my school years ago. He was a savant and played violin masterfully. He shocked everyone at the talent show and earned the longest standing ovation of anyone. Really wiped the laughter out of the audience within seconds and gave everyone an eye opening moment about how they had thought of him before that. Hope a few of them felt some shame over it.
I have a friend with downs who is 73. He is in failing health but was ambulatory up until the last couple years. His mom is 98 and also in failing health. We believe the only reason she is still alive is her pure will not to let him live to lose another parent. If he goes first I think she will go almost immediately after.
That’s beautiful and tragic at the same time. :’)
That is the most motherly thing I've read all day. It's absolutely heartbreaking for a parent to lose a child, but for a mother to be willing to endure that heartbreak just so her child doesn't have to experience losing both parents is painstakingly beautiful
Had a regular at my old job that was in his sixties and a co worker that was in his forties. The older biked EVERYWHERE. Like he would do hundred mile rides out of town. Anyway he got hit and killed by a car one day that ran a red light. Saddest day at that job I’d ever seen.
Awww man, that really got dark fast. I’m sorry to hear that :(
Today the average lifespan of a person with Down syndrome is approximately 60 years. As recently as 1983, the average lifespan of a person with Down syndrome was 25 years. The dramatic increase to 60 years is largely due to the end of the inhumane practice of institutionalizing people with Down syndrome.
In the past many children with DS did not survive childhood due to congenital heart defects. Now heart surgery in the first year is the norm. My own daughter ❤️ would not have survived without heart surgery at age 7 months. Many of her friends are on medication for thyroid issues. She is now a wonderful 14 year old who is thoroughly enjoying being a teenager.
My little sister has Downs. They gave her 2 weeks to live when she was born. She turned 35 in January. I reckon from pure stubborness she'll live to be 100.
It used to be fifty years, but with advances in medicine and better understanding of the common afflictions suffered by those with Downs, it's increased.
I read a really sad article that people with Down Syndrome have a higher chance of developing Alzheimer's and other brain degenerative diseases and we're only seeing it now because they never lived this long before. It was a really sad read. :(
I hate that my first thought is how absolutely destroyed he'll be when his father passes away in a few years.
Hopefully they pass away at the same exact time. In their sleep with no pain. They are both at average lifespan!
And back to the booze for me. Thanks reddit.
Fuck this, I'm going straight to smack!
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
The father is at least ten years over his average lifespan of males born in 1931.
I have to think the huge leap in people not quite old enough to be drafted in WWII means something pretty significant, but even then the men born in the '40s expect to live to 72 (I.E. dead now)
If you exclude infant mortality generally the lifespan is a bit longer, though he's still above average. On the plus side at age 88 his average life expectancy now is 4.69 years so he's got a few left.
My cousin has DS. He was 47 when his father died. Absolutely unequipped to handle it. Now his is 55(ish?) my aunt is 89, legally blind, holding on just for him.....the long term effects of Down syndrome that are not symptoms of the syndrome itself are possibly the worst part. We don’t know what to do when my aunt dies, there’s no money, he has lived in the same house since he was born and babied a little - life is hard, I guess.
Does he have a caseworker? There is often a wait list for the sorts of help he might be able to get, so start that conversation now if you can find the info. Anyone who cannot live independently is going to be eligible for assisted living, but you have to have all your ducks in a row and be patient. If you can help your aunt and cousin sort this out, please jump in!
Growing up, there was a nice older lady who babysat us that lived up the street. Her son had downs and lived in an apartment at the end of the street.
It's a long, sad story that I won't get into but when she passed away, he died about a month later.
If I were y’all I would start looking into state facilities. He will more than likely end up becoming a ward of the state, and put in a home paid for by the state. However if y’all can afford it, I’d look into what a residential group home might be like. That way y’all can start preparing him for it and then he’ll have a place to go after.
My 85 yo grandma whose 40+ yo son has William's Syndrome had a book with a roughly translated title of "I hope I die a day after my child - a guide for parents of mentally disabled".
That title could win awards for bleakest book title.
Not as bad as you think. When I was in college, there was this guy I used to know, about 40 years old who had a mental "disability" similar to Downs syndrome. He used to take the same trolley route that I did a couple times a week, and we quickly became friendly.
Anyways, he once mentioned his dad, and told me that despite missing him lots, he's happy to know he is in heaven with his grand parents, and that he knows that he is watching over him all the time, and that makes him smile. He then told me his dad is watching over me too. I cried when I got home.
Thanks for sharing that. It helps knowing there’s a chance this guy won’t be as heartbroken as I first imagined..
so i‘m not the only one... :(((
It's so sad considering the age at which down syndrome people pass. I don't know who would take the loss harder after this clip.
I am the guardian of a man with Down Syndrome who will be 68 next week.
Thats wonderful to hear! I was just going off what other comments were suggesting.
bless you, reddit stranger.
You're an awesome person for being there for that person, in case you don't hear that enough!
My sister has autism and just reading your comment, knowing there's people like you, warms my heart.
My brother with down syndrom is 16 so I try not thinking about it. He's a normal freaking teenager. Loves soccer, he plays guitar, piano and drums (he screamed at 4 when he received a xylophone), he loves shoes and cologne, Adidas, but contrary to classic teenagers he's very affectionate. He's always been a pranker too, and he adores animals and babies (with supervision).
I don't usually get sensitive from internet shit anymore, but damn. I have a twin brother with down syndrome who was really, really close with my dad. Like I've seen these exact kind of interactions between them with how close they were, a different kind of close that you get with kids with down syndrome than you do with your typical kids. It's actually insane how similiar the younger gentleman in this video looks and acts to my brother.
Our dad passed away a little less than a year ago (shoutout to agent orange) and this is my biggest struggle and worry. He has a wonderful relationship with my mom and I as well, but it was different with dad (or as he called him, Papa Bear) and I'm worried how he's handling it. He seems okay, and we've been doing a lot of activities and such and hanging out and now he's finishing school now, but I still see videos like this and it kinda breaks my heart he'll never get to do this again.
Edit: Thank you all for the words, I appreciate it. had some very nice PMs as well <3
You're a good brother man.
That's so sweet and sad. Bless your brother's sweet heart. You sound like a sweet brother too.
It's not always easy to know, but I'm sure everything you do is cherished by your brother, you can only do your best and that's all that counts
Hope you're doing okay though too ❤
This is fantastic! Just goes to show you’ll never stop being a parent, 88 and still going strong! So much respect, they’re both so damn happy. How many of us can say that we’re that happy to see our parents/kids at a much younger age. The guideline has been set.
Man, that moment when the son notices the cut on the dads arm and it was like he distracted him by asking if he had a good time. I might just be emotional and reading too far into it but that was so sweet. Like ah, don’t worry about me, son, I’m here to help you and make sure that you’re happy.
This reminds me of something another dad said on Reddit: “someday, I’ll pick my daughter up and put her down for the last time...this breaks my heart.”
I’m excited to see my daughters grow up, but damn I love being a cuddly dad, and still the coolest dude for them.
Wow. I usually dont lose it while reading the comments
“Just goes to show you’ll never stop being a parent”
my dad didn’t get the memo. can you send this video back to 1999 please
“Just goes to show you’ll never stop being a parent”
my dad didn’t get the memo. can you send this video back to 1999 please
My dad shares some personality traits with Tywin Lannister; I don't think he would even comprehend the memo....
The father sounds so sweet it's amazing. Very heartwarming video.
I mean there's "you'll never stop being" then there's "you're legally still your 53 year old son's caretaker and can't stop being".
Most people parent their adult children. Most people don't expect their baby to need to be babied for 60 years.
Well ione of the issues with Down syndrome is that they literally never stop being a child and their parents never stop raising that child.
It's selfish and not very compassionate, but it just thinking about 50 years of raising a kid is exhausting
I guess you are not a father. I have a 9.5 year old son. Fortunately, he does not have DS or anything similar. But I am dreading the day that he will fly off to university and I will see him a couple of weeks per year. I know it is part of life and I know I will just have to live with it. But I also wish ithat day never happens.
Even now, I am not really "raising him" much anymore. He does not require much attention or assistance from me. But I really love having him around and I just know it is very temporary.
From the looks of this father, I really doubt his son exhausts him. Even after 50 years.
23 years old and in grad school. I’m gonna call my pops tonight
And this day my heart grew 3 times its size.
My uncle had Down Syndrome (passed away at age 52 in 2016) and was one of the most amazing people I have ever been around. He called me every night at 9 p.m (because that is when minutes used to be free) when I was in high school, college, and married. He even called me and 9 on my honey moon night. Truly miss him every day. Don't take the small things for granted. What I would give for a 9 p.m call right now. :)
Let’s be honest. Isn’t there a part of us that wants to do this when we go home and see our parents (assuming we had a good relationship with them), regardless of whether we have Down syndrome or not? I do....
Edit: getting downvoted because I made a comment about how I love my parents? Well that was unexpected.
I don't have that type of relationship with my parents but I wish I did. They never showed verbal or physical.affection. I even asked if I was desired. Took a while.to get over them. And therapy .
So downvotes may be from.folks like me without therapy. Forgive them.
Guess what type of parent I'm gonna be with my kids? Overaffectionate to the max.
I understand. I’m not upset. Was just surprised to be downvoted so quickly and decisively. But it’s no biggie.
I’m sorry that has been your experience. I’m sure you will be a wonderful parent someday. :)
Sweet comment :). I have a good relationship with my parents - but we rarely hug or talk about how we feel about each other. But I know they love me, and I love them. Pherhaps I should hug them more;
I come from a family that is similar. All stoic and no one says "I love you" or hugs a lot. My brother has been having some health issues and I started saying "I love you" frequently to my entire family unit. The first couple times it took a beat for the expression to be returned but we say it more often and hug as well. It's nice.
I left home 23 years ago for college. I still hug and kiss the heck out of my parents when I pick them up at the airport. I don't agree with my parents on many things but I love them and they love me.
Yep. I still tear up when I leave at the end of a visit like 50% of the time.
My dad cringes at hugs and has only ever said i love you once to me, im 26. You're very fortunate! Some may be jealous, i am envious. Makes me very uncomfortable to see affectionate fathers now strangely enough, maybe one day ill get over it. I love him regardless, just learned to accept that's how he is.
I used to do this when my mom was still alive.
I’m 22 and I feel this way every time I see my mother again, even if its only been a couple hours. Because thats my mama. ❤️
I don't speak to my parents, but I do wish sometimes I had parents who I cared about even half as much as this man cares about his dad.
The downvotes might be from jealous/salties that don't have that type of hug/ physical affection connection with their folks.
Might be. I tried to qualify the comment by acknowledging not everyone has that kind of relationship with their folks. But oh well. /shrug...
I hope my kid feels this way when she's all grown up. She's not even here yet, but your comment is super sweet.
I don't really feel this way when I see my parents (well, maybe my mom to an extent), but I truly want to be the kind of mom who makes her kids feel this level of love
It's still a good sentiment. The way things ought to be
My sister lived to be 53 and it was 53 years of unqualified love. I don't think there was a day she didn't show love for the people around her. She had a boyfriend for 47 years that lived with my folks, they met in school and loved each other most of their lives, he passed at 50. They held hands and cuddled on the couch watching TV, they worked together 5 days a week. They were the happiest two people I ever saw. They left a big hole in all of the families lives when they passed. My kids and my grand kids, even grand daughter loved to have tea parties with them even into adulthood.
My brother is mentally disabled and I’ve never seen my father (former state trooper) show any affection towards him. Or myself. It’s nice to know there are real men out there.
Ummm same with me internet stranger.Exactly the same brother and father situation
I miss my parents...
I’d give anything to have had a relationship like this with either of my parents.
I’m a 53 year old man 6’4’’ 280 pound construction worker now with a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye. Wishing everyone could feel love like that
This is cute just as much as it's heartbreaking in knowing when his dad passes away he's won't know how to handle it
i know we're supposed to find this touching. but god damn... 53 yrs this man got 1 week to himself.
that's definitely how it is for some people. a dear friend of mine has a 25 year old son who has autism and some other differences. he can work and he ranks very high in video game competitions (he's won quite a bit of money from them) and enjoys his friendships. but due to some physical differences he will always live with his parents and can't get a driver's license. awesome kid but I don't think my friends have ever spent more than a few days away from him. they stopped trusting caretakers when a day care casually abused their son. developed a flat spot on his head as a baby because the daycare literally just put him on his back and didn't do anything with him and gave attention to the other kids instead.
he's a cool dude tho. nice to know he's always around when I wanna hang out
My father who has been living with a my brother (Prader-Willi syndrom) for all his life since he was born (26 years and counting) is starting to struggle a lot with the idea that he’s going to live the rest of his life with him.
We had some pretty disheartening conversations about it during the last year and it creates a ton of conflicts between him and my mother. You can love the person as much as you want, it’s still going to be really challenging at times, especially when the loved one you have to take care of becomes and adult.
Its a type of self sacrifice some of us will never know or have to deal with. Thats an admirable human being right there.
And even worse you can't even have a week off together with your wife... It's really not an easy life
Not trying to sound like an ass but it would be much better if worded “son with down syndrome” recognize the person before their disability!
Edit: Thank you for gold!
Came here to say this. As someone in public service, I was taught that the proper way to say what OP wanted to say is “son with DS”. Saying it this way implies he is a son first and foremost and doesn’t imply that DS is his foremost indentifier.
Wish my dad loved me that much
Wow... this is the most beautiful thing! 😢
yes. everybody needs a hug like that one.
We have a 13 year old DS student at our school. I helped teach her. She has different tasks to the other students but goes to all the same lessons. We have her in “life skills” which includes how to shop or catch a bus. She is a wonderful and determined person and a joy to be with unless she is tired, then she can be moody - like us all! She is an asset to our community!