I never feel like I'm doing enough.

This semester I am out of classes and working on my dissertation proposal. I also TA and am trying to publish an article. I have 3 conferences lined up this semester and 1 poster presentation.

But I feel like I should be doing more.. I can't ever shake this feeling. The job market in my field is abysmal right now and you really have to set yourself apart from others. So any time I don't add another thing to do I feel like I am failing myself. I'm not teaching yet, for example, or doing community outreach.. Maybe I should be writing more.. Or doing research assistance..

Is this warranted or am I overthinking things? Do others feel this way?

Submited on :	Sat, 12th of Jan 2019 - 01:03:55 AM
Subreddit :	GradSchool
Author :	Satellite0fLove
Comments :	6
Points :	8
UPVOTED :	85%
Post ID :	aexegv
Post Name :	t3_aexegv
Post Type :	text
Subreddit Type :	public
Subreddit ID :	t5_2r4r8

Top 200 Comments :

Hippotheh

This feeling IS getting a phd.

I had a really good friend who was 2 years my senior in her phd. She checked EVERY SINGLE BOX by the time she graduated. 2 predoc fellowships, something like 15 papers, 4+ years time working at ronald mcdonald house, a billion conferences, travel awards, presenting awards, and she ALWAYS spent 10 hours in the lab every single day. plus weekends.

Anyway, turns out she was a complete cunt and tried to sleep with my husband (who told me). She was also miserable AF.

Moral of the story is being a ridiculously good phd student doesn't make you a good person. Or make your life fulfilling. Might get you a good job I guess, but so do connections and word of mouth through being a good human being. Breathe and do your best work with what IS on your plate. It will look better than taking on more and doing shitty work.

Satellite0fLove

Thanks. I mean I don't feel like I'm a bad person if not, but I'm really feeling pressure to get a job in another country and also I suck at networking so I feel like I have to compensate extra for that because so many people seem like naturals at it.

Hippotheh

Naw... especially in academia... no one is a natural at it. In fact some of the best connections I've made have been at the hotel bar at a conference.

Satellite0fLove

i guess some people fake it well! haha i don't know how people at conferences have the capacity to interact by the evening but i guess that is something else i need to work on.

FazedDazedCrazed

I feel like this all the time, but you know what? Other students in your program feel like this as well, even the ones you seem "more successful" than you or who are further along than you. And I'm sure students behind you in the program look up to you, hoping they can work toward a publication and present at 3 conferences one day.

We are our own worst enemies and are always harder on ourselves. Still doesn't make it easy, I know, but try to remember that and celebrate what you've accomplished instead of worrying about what you haven't yet.

Satellite0fLove

Thanks! I am trying to think positively about what i have done already, but sometimes it gets to me and i think i could always squeeze something else in to do. i think in accomplishments i am comparable to my cohort, but when i venture out to meet other students it seems like they are already so successful and barely further in their program than i am.

I never feel like I'm doing enough.

Top 200 Comments :

Hippotheh

Satellite0fLove

Hippotheh

Satellite0fLove

FazedDazedCrazed

Satellite0fLove

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