|Submited on :||Sat, 15th of Dec 2018 - 12:58:44 PM|
|Post ID :||a6f0h4|
|Post Name :||t3_a6f0h4|
|Post Type :||link|
|Subreddit Type :||public|
|Subreddit ID :||t5_2qh33|
Poor critter was scrolling on r/all, rookie mistake
I sort by new and try my best to filter the bullshit from the quality stuff.
It gets lonely out there so i occasionally hop back to frontpage :)
It gets lonely out there so i occasionally hop back to frontpage :)
Like right now I see.
Hey there is no shame in returning to the front page for a little karma to tide you over until you find a gem in sorted-by-new.
You sir/madam are doing god's work
What's wrong with scrolling on r/all?
Nothing, the way you use your social media is entirely subjective.
It's just a lot of scrolling
If you filter enough it is the enlightened way of using Reddit. Ascend with me brother.
There's also the occasional NSFW post
Where the end of scroll... is also the end of your data plan.
The "We're from tumblr" part killed me
Well, there won't be much pussy left on Tumblr soon.
Soon we will see large migrations from the tumblr regions. Be prepared my friends :'0
Optimistic take: maybe a little Tumblrification will counteract the Facebookification?
That's like taking a little heroin to balance out your coke binge.
You’re the expert we need!
Can you draw 7 red lines all perpendicular with each other with green ink?
My mind needs that cocaine chased with naproxen now
Thanks, I hate it.
Whoever said meth was bad for a heroin binge?
U got any meth?
Jokes on you I've been using both for a while now.
I CAN'T EVEN I'M LITERALLY SHAKING
"OMG I'M DEAD"
WHERE DO I FIND MY EXTREMELY NICHE PORN NOW
TBF it'll be even easier to find niche porn after this, if the Tumblr exclusives come here, and post to their designated subreddits.
I could hear them say it
Rest in peace tumblr
You and I were there for the same reason.
Probably the majority of users on tumblr were there for those reasons. And I don't exaggerate, I think the largest proportions of tumblr were reserved for NSFW content of some kind.
Either way the new tumblr after the 18th will not just be a tumblr without NSFW, it'll be a tumblr without any edge at all.
Sorry I’m OOTL, but what’s going on with Tumblr?
Tumblr's had a huge problem with pornbots and people posting child porn. So instead of directly dealing with that, they're just banning nudity in general on the 17th. Yep, even anatomy and still life art.
And the problem is the system they're using to do this is also tagging pictures and deleting art blogs that don't have nudity (like pics of rocks and old cartoons), so a lot of artists and users are leaving Tumblr en masse with their followers behind them.
Ah got it. Thanks!
Bawww, someone replied before I got to.
Along with what the others said, as I assume you possibly aren't very known with tumblr (and I'm not either beyond this area, giggity), tumblr has a lot - and I mean a lot - of artists who make money off using tumblr as their platform. These are all kinds of artists, but most notably are the hundreds of NSFW creators. Here they can publish, link and advertise their work and bring attention to their stuff like twitter and patreon.
Big point: Tumblr is a site that's not great just for blogging but also working as sort of a free website for a content creator. This is why so many people are on there, it does a great job at this. Or soon I can say it did.
It goes without a saying that a lot of people therefore relied on tumblr for their income. It was a good site for communicating with your fanbase and posting artwork and through promoting their work they could earn money from commissions/donations/patreons. These blogs will be permanently removed, a long with a shitload more blogs who even come close to being "NSFW". Bear in mind, it's far from just porn being banned, it's all NSFW content with the exception of artistic expression of some kind, where there'd be a really low tolerance for (think David by Michelangelos, that'd be accepted) much flexibility. And as a closing thought, what is art if it can't be a little bit fucking dearing? No pun intended.
If there's any question I'd love to try and elaborate.
Hour 2, still pooping.
30 minutes in. Still pushing but nothing coming out. Send help.
Stop and try another time. You won’t want to cause unnecessary blood pressure spikes
Hour 3, I´m starting to get hungry, but there´s only one thing to eat...
"I finished pooping 20 minutes ago" - this ended me
Now your legs are dead and you aren't able to stand up so you shift your weight on one side to let the blood flow back to one leg and repeat the same thing to the other leg.
This is about to be my life for the next five minutes.
This is Reddit! We poop together, we fight...well each other.
That's honestly one of the best sentences to describe Reddit ever.
Hey my shitty brother from different mother!!
Literally read this as I lean to the right to let my left leg regain vitality. Glad to know this is universal.
Just like us, our legs get lazy too
I don't know when I'll ever get to tell this story and it'll be buried far enough down at this point so here goes:
I'm a pretty regular guy in terms of my digestive functions. I poop around the same time everyday in the same stall, in the same bathroom, for roughly the same amount of time at work. Every day. Through trial and error, I've willed my body to get on a poop schedule that'll provide me with the best window to not be interrupted. I get to work 15 minutes earlier just to have the bathroom to myself. Now you may be wondering, "Why don't you just poop at home?" To that I say, there's nothing better on this earth than being paid to poop. Not sex, not food, nothing. The smugness of knowing that I don't poop for free is what gets me out of beds some mornings.
Cue a brisk November morning. It's a long walk from the parking garage to the office and since the wrong is blowing pretty hard, I'm doing a weird powerwalk/jog to get to the office. It's important to note that the only things that get me to move fast these days are free food and free booze. Since my body is moving faster than its normal pace, my stomach thinks it's about to get fed. Brain's like, "Time to make room!" You know that scene from Major Payne where they feed him laxative and his stomach starts gurgling? That's exactly what my stomach sounded like. I get to my desk, put my stuff down, and make a beeline to the restroom preparing myself to reenact the 1883 eruption of Krakatoa.
I get to my stall, drop trou, and brace myself. One second and two medium sized turds later and it was all over. That was it? I shifted my weight and did a little rocking back and forth but nothing. All that show for nothing.
After taking a moment to bring myself back down to earth, I pull out my phone and prepare to spend the next 13 minutes interneting. Someone comes in, I don't think twice about it. I'm done pooping, all the urinals are open, and there are plenty of stalls. A few seconds later...
Knock Knock Knock
"You gonna be in there much longer?"
Right as I get ready to answer, I look down and it's the someone in a wheelchair. I work for a large company but I'm pretty sure none of my co workers have wheelchairs, so I never accounted for this type of interruption. If you haven't figured it out by now, I guess it's time to mention that my favorite stall happened to be the wheelchair accessible stall. In my defense, I can't poop in close quarters. I need the freedom and room that the big stall gives me. Back to my predicament. I apologize, clean up, and as I'm standing up to leave -- pins, needless, numbness, the works. I open the door and stumble out of the stall. I have to use the wall to keep me up because my legs were completely uncooperative. Wheelchair guy looks at me and I see his face go from mild inconvenience to sympathy.
"I'm sorry brother, it just annoys me sometimes when able-bodied people take our stalls."
I give him a light hearted "yeah man", wash my hands and as soon as he's in the stall, I bolt out of there. I haven't seen him around the office since, but if he does work there, I still haven't decided how I'm going to explain how I've been "healed." That's a problem for future Blacky, I suppose.
Well not reading 'shift' as 'shift' sure changed the meaning quite a bit
Fun fact: it is actually compression of the sciatic nerve that causes that pins and needles feeling. The blood supply to your legs comes from the femoral arteries, which are more in the front of your thighs.
where did you place the camera?
Don't forget to wipe and check.
Don't even need to click
I click anyway because it's fun to watch Aubrey losing it in the background.
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!
I think I should add that to the end of all of my posts from now on...
...I....I don't think this guy's seen Gladiator. I think everyone on this site is fortnite years old.
No ones gonna point out the username?
Source: The Secret Life of Pets 2 Trailer
How are they not going to ruin most of the jokes with a series of individual character trailers?
They ARE going to use all the jokes. Mass market audiences prefer smugly recognizing something they've already seen over being surprised by the movie.
When I go watch a movie at the theater, I've noticed that the jokes used in the trailers for that movie tend to be the ones people laugh at the hardest even though I'm sure most of the people already know the punchline from having watched those trailers.
HA HA HA I REMEMBER THAT ONE. HA HA WHAT A LAUGH.
Sounds suspiciously similar to Reddit humour. "HAHA YEAH BROKE MY ARMS / TOOK AN ARROW TO THE KNEE / COCONUTS."
It’s because they are the funniest jokes in the movie. Think about it: why would you make a trailer but put the mediocre to worst parts into it. Nobody would go see the movie. The trailer is usually the best jokes and best visuals of the movie, the rest isn’t going to be quite as good. I still watch trailers because for me it doesn’t ruin the movie. I want to get the general feel for its atmosphere, not memorize lines. But some people tend to hyperanalyze trailers and then feel like the movie is ruined for them. And some smugly point out that they shouldn’t watch trailers. To each their own.
I just entirely don’t watch trailer. It began as just generally being lackadaisical about movies, but as I’ve continued doing so, I’ve noticed that I enjoy movies a lot more when I don’t watch the trailers, so I’ve just kept it up. Highly recommend.
It honestly baffles me a little bit.
Your brain loves patterns. It has a tiny little braingasm everytime it recognizes a pattern is happening and successfully predicts the outcome. Thats why you like music. Its all just your brain jerking off to complimentary fractions.
Thats why kids like repetitive movies with safe predictable plots and running jokes and then watch the same thing 500 times with glee even though they know the ending.
Sometimes we just dont fully grow out of that little vice.
I think people also feel microscopically more superior when they recognize a pattern that others wouldnt be able to.
Your brain loves patterns. It has a tiny little braingasm everytime it recognizes a pattern is happening and successfully predicts the outcome. Thats why you like music. Its all just your brain jerking off to complimentary fractions. Thats why kids like repetitive movies with safe predictable plots and running jokes and then watch the same thing 500 times with glee even though they know the ending. Sometimes we just dont fully grow out of that little vice. I think people also feel microscopically more superior when they recognize a pattern that others wouldnt be able to.
I suddenly understand why my dad obsessively watches trailers.
Sweet! I actually really enjoyed the first one. It was the first movie my daughter actually liked and she loved it. Now she's old enough for me to take her to see something in the theater
I appreciate you, not-bringing-your-infant-into-the-theater man.
As a former usher, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for not bringing your infant to the movie.
We didn't like asking people to leave, and seeing a parent blow half the film in the hallway rocking a crying infant seems like a waste of money.
I know its early to determine anything but, what happened to Duke the big dog that was adopted in the first film?
That was actually pretty funny. I approve of it.
Where was the big dog?
I, for one, like your PP
The accuracy is unsettling. . .lol
Except for the dickbutt part, absolutely. Haven't seen a dickbutt post in ages, and I've literally never seen anyone annoyed by a lack of dickbutt.
You know, I've never taken a good hard look at this picture before. This is a man with millions upon millions of dollars from his NFL contracts and Papa Johns endorsement deals and he does that to whats probably a $30 balaclava. I am perplexed.
Gotta hear the refs when they announce it was an interception.
You are inviting disasters my friend.
Make the posts you want to see on the internet
Every bit of that pretty much sums up my experiences on this site, and I'm not even new anymore
Especially the part where I was done pooping 20 minutes ago
So I know PP from imgur and the great gif wars of the past. I kinda feel like I know a celebrity now, did you know that you have one of the most upvoted posts of all time on Reddit @op? I mean you always got to the front page on Imgur, but Reddit is like Hollywood homie. You made it. You’re big time now. Will you remember the little people years from now? ;)
Hi! Thanks for the compliment. My "Guardians of the Front Page" gif is still listed at the top of all time, but that'll change when they update the list. Oh well... when they do update the list, I'll be the only user to have 2 in the top 10 of all time with "Reddit's Immigrants". So I got that going for me, which is nice.
I’ve almost moved over completely. I was on imgur from the very beginning and loved it back in the day. At the time Reddit was around but was mostly text and less pictures and memes didn’t really exist yet. Fast forward to 2018 and I’m pretty much exclusively on Reddit. The content of Imgur has gotten so thirsty for women and pretty poor in comedy quality IMHO. I miss Sarah jokes, and loved The Cera guy and the gif wars. I always hated RedheadMonday, and people and their fucking weight loss stories. Anyway, glad to see a friendly face. You make awesome fucking gifs.
Thanks! I'm with you on RHM and the weight loss stuff. Don't get me started on money animals and dumps, but I still love posting there as much as I do here.
And all that traction in only two years. Wow!👍🏼
Shouldn't this go in /r/highqualitygifs
Oh God... I do feel like that every time I post something...
Really nicely done. First time viewing for me. Will I see it again later in a repost? Is this a repost? I don’t know!
Thanks! It's not a repost. I only posts gifs I make.
Oh you made this?
I made this
I absolutely lost it at the hamster. "I scroll, and I scroll..." and it's so accurate.
We’re from Tumblr 😂😂😂
Impressive. Here’s an upvote.
The Tumbler Twins, that's some funny shit right there...
All these comments yet i can call first on upvoting OP first ... yay me
Is this the new Guardians of the Front Page?
I chuckled way too hard at this
I was actually on tumblr 5 minutes before seeing thos post on reddit.
Severely disappointed that you did not put dickbutt in there after the perfect set up
Oh, you missed it?
It's the same dude from highest upvoted post of all times.
Ooo this is fucking gold.
I actually did finish pooping 20 mins ago...
This post deserves Reddit Gold. Had me cracking up the whole time!
This is gonna be big
I, for one, still appreciate a good dickbutt every now and again.
INSERT QUOTE FROM GIF
I AM DEAD
Never seen this movie, but for some reason I'm hearing Seth Rogen's voice from the main dog.
Ahhh it's nice to get mentioned in post
This gif just keeps on giving. The ending really got me though.
hahah, Were from tumblr killed me
You put a lot of work into it. And this made me smile, thank you :)
This is the only thing that matters
3 am shit and ended 10 minutes ago
Stop stalking me
This is terrible.