Felt the same till I was 25 when I met the right guy that I wanted to have a relationship with. Otherwise it was just jerking and sucking with friends.

Problem is I am in a relationship, and have been almost a year. I really wanna explore my sexuality, but also don't wanna cheat or break up

also don't wanna cheat or break up

Sure, but

I have a gay friend, he let me explore my sexuality a little more. I sucked his dick and swallowed and I loved it and I got rock hard, but when he sucked mine I didn't feel so turned on

Err.....

I can see that the timeline seems confusing... The dick thing happened around oktober/November last year, and my girlfriend and I started dating in December. So when I say I recently started doubting,I mean this past year